17 going where?

I've blogged 17 times and now what?
I was given very good advice by a master of this craft, and I will share the hard truth with you:

"What do you want to write about? There surely must be something you are keenly interested in"
...gulp, the damnedest thing happens when someone asks you such an obvious question that surely I must have asked myself already...but I didn't. It's as if the wind has been knocked out of you, you are alone, hand extended and asking for help. The other arm is there, but right now it's just a little too far to grab...and hold.

I just started writing and that's it. It's about everything and anything. Now there's a pressure to pick a side. I feel tugged, pulled but also pushed down. How do I proceed? What's wrong with writing for the sake of writing...everything. That's just it, I said it right there in my previous statement...I can't write for the sake of writing, I have to make a difference, pick a side, pick an angle.
I feel stumped, why? Because I'm scared? Scared of what, possibilities of a greater life. I've had several dreams lately where I'm at the start line and I am fiddling with my headband and re-tying my shoelaces, over and over again. Anything to postpone a decision, a start. The ideal has been played in my mind many many ....many times. I am a writer, I am known and I feel successful. I've dreamt the feeling of success, felt the power of being " that's her" I know how it feels looking at that moment in my life. The reality of it is quick sand. It has got a hold of me and I want to stomp on the start line and begin my trek.
Really, anyone can write. Open a new document and think of something happy, or sad, think of something, and start writing but put you guts in it. Write as if your next breath depended on your thesis, give it some thought BUT not too much. Oh gosh my dear readers, just write, prove to me that you and I are going somewhere with this.
................pause...................
Like all great things started, to make them last takes work. I knew eventually I would have to do more that "this" but my soul isn't ready to want more.
...............pause...................
I take that back. My soul is thirsty for the pleasure of treating you all with the verse of controversy, the detail of imagination and the beauty of the written word.

I will "go to the mattresses" wake up and re-read today's blog. Over and over and over until I am done with the laces and passing though the ribbon.